o/
This is my first collaborative...or um, 'guest' post for this blog. My beautiful and amazing wife Wolfy hit me with the above revelation over the holiday weekend and rather than try and explain her thoughts, I turned the keyboard over to her and just let her go!
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| I'm sure you can imagine just how much porn I had to skim thru (tragedy) on a 'gamer porn images' google search to find something that wouldn't be 'offensive' as a thumbnail on other peoples' blog rolls! |
So, in her words:
Gaming is like porn...
You have the wham, bam, thank you ma'am (guy porn) or you have the story line punctuated with hot hardcore sex scenes (girl porn).
Allow me to expound upon that a little.
The pizza delivery guy shows up and the girl immediately goes for his dick and BAM they go at it... and you have 5 more hours of the fuckfest where it's all about the money shot. This is guy porn. This is 40K, Bolt Action, (most) X-Wing, Warmahordes, etc. Guys walk in, pull out the minis and wham, bam there they go killing each other... Winner is the one who hits the money shot the hardest or has the biggest hardest throbbyingist (lol, is that even a word?!?! Who cares its hilarious!) thingies. Just like in porn the guys with the biggest thingies that handle the most silicone parts (as opposed to plastic or resin) are the winners.
And this explains why I get bored with most games nowadays.
Now on the flip side you have RPG's.. they are like girl porn (think Pirates and Pirates 2 - yeah like you don't know about the most expensive pornos ever made...). There is a lead in, a story, some seriously hot and hardcore sex (action) throughout the entire thing. It's mental stimulation that leads to physical stimulation and satisfaction. Not to mention you can still use miniatures, maps and even terrain.
Although I do have to be fair, X-wing can actually do both. It's one of the few games that can cross the barrier and excite as well as stimulate and satisfy. X-wing has scenarios... (she says 'objectives' based scenarios don't count) this is what makes things so much more fun! Like having amazing sex with someone that knows what they are doing with their thingies that leaves you weak kneed, dizzy and sated as opposed to leaving you sore and wondering why you even bothered.
With that last sentence, I like to think I'm the former rather than the latter, but be careful in asking her. Wolfy's anything but prude (as you may have already guessed) and any reply she makes will all too likely be TMI!!! lol, anyways...in a nutshell, I guess she's a 'narrative gamer' and uh yeah. We're really looking for a good GM and RPG group too.
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